Jillian Michaels.... and ME!

I have started to workout again-- and it is  absolutely HORRIBLE! We have a little workout room and I bought some info-mercial workout that I thought... "Look, I can do this. Who in the world needs a gym".
It happens to be kickboxing... which I had done many a years back after my cancer stint. It was great to get back into shape and "air box" some of the frustrations I had..... I had a LOT back then.
So, I see it- think- YES!!! Get it and I feel like I am a spasmo ... no rhythm, no fun. What in the HELL has happened to me? Oh- yes, the children... they have SUCKED my brain cells and all athletic ability from my body. I see it in them every day.... ugh, kids!
SOOOOO- I then had a JILLIAN MICHAEL's DVD I had purchased before moving here.

Little background..... I am a gym junkie. I am a group workout type person. I loved the Runtex killer training runs. I have run 1 marathon ( enough for me- thank you) and 9 triathlons. Oodles of 5ks and10ks and other gigs. I loved my trainer. After I had MR... I got back to PRE-weight. You know- the weight were my hubby was GaGa over me... I was training for my first marathon.. I was F-I-T.! I wore a dress that was Oscar worthy for my hubby's 50th. I will say- smokin'!! I have a drive to compete when I workout. I want to kill myself being faster , better , stronger than the next. I use to be able to run with the top dogs at one point.  I also had knees. Thanks to genetics, I have my dad's knees. They sound like gravel when I walk, they ache daily and to crouch or stoop makes me moan like a moose. It is ugly....my athletic days have faded. Those days are GONE like my skinny jeans. They are now a mere image of who I once was.... and now I have to find a new me in a new way.

Fast forward from MR. I have "slacked" after having Elizabeth. Lord, I was so sick for so long. Was getting BACK into shape and WHAMMO- Henry.
Ok, Ok, Ok, so fast forward again. I am in WA- needing to be active so I can deal with daily stress.
(HONESTLY- folks- just do something for 20-30 mins a day--5x a week- see how your mood changes!)
I said to Hades with the kickboxing crap! I need something that makes me get it done in a half hour!
I opened up JILLIAN MICHAELS 30 DAY SHRED!  You know her from the "Biggest Looser.".. she is tough, mean but has a part that really thinks she cares. This might be the best $12.99 I have ever spent!!
It is EXACTLY what I am looking for..... 20 minutes of make you sweat, mix it up workout. I have found my Utopia! It is great! GREAT!!!! For the fastest 20 plus minutes I am jumping jacking, weight lifting, static moves and ab crunching my way to a better me.
I am on day 4 and EVERY day I think-- I hate this, I hate working out and who gives a $%^*!!
Then I think-- HOLD UP!! What would Jillian say? Oh- I am sure it is not a clean sentence for me to write. Then I think, but I feel better after I do it. I think- who cares if my body is full of lactic acid and I can barely move... who cares if I can't brush my hair because my pecks hurt, who cares if I don't shave my legs for a week because bending down just HURTS.... just put one foot in front of another you PANSY!!!! And off I go- into the manshack. I look at myself in the mirror ( brunette and all) and say- "You can do anything for 20 minutes- don't be such a looser". I hit play.

So- you are probably thinking-- WHY is she torturing herself? Why if she hurts so bad- why doesn't she take a day off....
Listen- I am in TERRIBLE shape. You would think if I am carrying around a 20 pound baby, cleaning house and chasing kids I would be "fit". NOPE!! I have lost muscle mass. This is what is important. Not the size of jean you wear but the fat to muscle ratio. The more muscle- the more energy. The more you can go, do and be. The more fat- the more you want to give in... on everything.
So- I might look "tiny" to some of you... but underneath lies a hot mess. All squishy and little resemblance of the days where I had muscle. It is so very easy to loose what you worked for....
I now have done my workout and realize- day 4 wasn't as much torture as day 1-3. As a matter of fact, I look forward to it. I tried level 2 the other day and realized that was a total mistake. Stay on level one for 7 days before moving on.
I think if I stick with it for the 30 days there will be a difference. If not, I give up!
Seriously- I took measurements and weighed. I groaned and shook my head. Again- it is NOT about the number on my jeans- but how do I feel? How do my clothes fit that are hanging in the closet getting dust on them. It is about gaining energy and brain power.... not being so tired!!

Here is the challenge- I will keep a log every five days of what is going on with the workouts. And for laughs I will post a before and after photo at the end. Yes, you will get tortured by my complaining.... but see if you can pick up the DVD and join me! It could just change the way you feel about working out. One thing- I am not giving up my one glass a wine a night. A girl has to have a "reward".
OH- and if Jillian Michaels is reading this blog-- feel free to call me and tell me to pick up the pace! I need positive- strong reinforcements!!!

Just a random picture.... cheers to good health!